Sociopaths Can't Love You
by Alex is Bills Kleiner Android
Summary: Alex is a psychopath on the verge of breaking, Collette is a sociopath, Asha is a schizophrenic, they are best friends what happens when they 'meet' tokio hotel in the most interesting way? Tokio Hotel, Bill, Tom, fiction
1. Chapter 1

**Sociopaths Can't Love You**

_Prologue_

Authoress Note: I have to many stories but my creativity sensors won't shut up so here is another one! Oh a note for the future don't run up to your mother right after church and say 'how do you spell sociopath' people look at you like 0.0 ~!!!!! My friend Collette is helping me out. She wrote Collette's part MY LORD! ROCKET SCIENCE. Ahahhah sorry. SO please review. Also we know we are messed up so don't comment on how these to people need help and yes we think like this. Both ways. Lachen ist eine Luge.

Alex

All adolescents profile as sociopaths.

It's true did you know that?

I apologize let me start again

My name is Alex I am 14

My best friend Collette is a year younger than me

Can I tell my story?

Can I make it a poem?

Can I make it rhyme?

Do I have the skill to keep it in time?

Again, distracted

I apologize

I am a Girl

I like to read

I have no emotions

I can barely sing on key

Tokio Hotel is my favorite band

I used to love Bill

That was my plan

Then I lost all emotion

They all slid away

Like water down a drain

That's not true

I still feel pain

But I don't care

That's the difference

The absence of good

Left only with bad

And not caring

Hm, my story seems so sad

Oh well, to bad

It's all I have

That's not true either

I have a family and a home

A place where I don't belong

"Friends" I spend time with

People I am forced to see

One person used to matter

His name Was Bill Kaulitz

It was pathetic

But then pathetic is me

Then I think I lost that

He is still here in my mind

Haunting me

Never letting go

I still feel the need

But love, I think it's beyond me

I used to be vibrant

I used to care

Now I wonder if it was ever there

I let go of happiness

I let go of smiles

To get rid of the pain

It helped for a while

Now I'm glad its gone

Never would want it back

Happiness is so easily turned black

Then there's Collette

My closest friend

We share nothing

But a brain, a mind set

Completely Alone

Our minds are almost mirrors

Almost identical

Closer than twins

Better than sisters

Bound by emptiness

The Knowledge that we are nothing

And nothing is all we'll ever be

I call her my best friend

This term is perhaps misleading

I feel nothing for her

She feels nothing for me

We used to perhaps

Before our humanity slipped away

Shoved away like a broken toy

Forgotten like us

The world for got they knew us

And we let them believe

We were human

Though if you look close

It's quite easy to see that lie

There is nothing

Nothing but darkness on the inside

Collette

My name happens to Collette be. I am not sorry if jumbled this account of my life appears, but one might understand first that my brain works in this same way, and I feel not like exerting much today effort. Actually, I feel not like much anything any day. Like in seasons of snow and ice, all emotions of mine are frozen and trapped like in ice for eternity—longer than life (yes, for all you affected by retardation, eternity longer is than life).

Perhaps it would serve to explain. I put away emotion ages long ago, and not with intentions much. I am sad not—it is hard to sad be when one is not allowed so to be—I am happy to have put away my "humanity," or as close to happy as one such as I can be.

Long ago, I had a longing for one human. One human's name was Tom, although preferred by I was to call him Tommi. To me, was it cuter. This be may one of things only that I miss about feeling. I can no longer recall what it like was to cling onto the now-absent hopes of one day perhaps to meet this boy so we could, like an ending fairy tale, slip away to be in love. But now the love is gone, it has fled. Was it ever there really? Probably not. It is all illusionary now. Or so it seems to be.

But time slowly now passes, the seconds drip away into sands never recovered to be, like blood slowly drains from the body of one who has stabbed been, the seconds precious of life drain away to leave a shell, an empty shell forever to be devoid of feelings all. Slowly, everything that normally would snap a human in parts two become only pinpricks on my skin. I do notice not anymore.

Much better it is that way. People now leave alone my thoughts and me. They find it not fulfilling to talk to one who responds not in the places that one classified as normal would laugh or cry or gasp. Desensitized I have become, and everything means to me nothing in the present days. I perhaps grew tired of falsifying love, pretending to care for the humankind. A person with their feelings is like a seashell—they are too easily broken and crushed, blown away into the beach of broken shells, broken dreams.

No longer will I make believe to laugh. No more laughter. The laughter is a lie.

**Bill**

After a while even fame becomes hard to manage. You dream of it for so long. Then like so many other things once it's yours you realize it's not quite what you wanted. I never thought when I started my journey toward fame all those years ago that one day I would be The Bill Kaulitz. That I would be unable to leave my house alone, that I wouldn't be able to find a girl who loved me heart and soul not the Kaulitz fortune. I didn't think that having millions of fans meant having no one to hold at night. Well no one that truly connected with you. I could never be like my brother and give myself away to every passing whore with a good rack. It's not that I don't notice girls or even that I don't want them. It's simply that I want something deeper. I never thought I would have to find a girl incapable of loving to find love.

**Tom**

I still can't see why my brother is so dissatisfied with fame and fortune. An endless supply of girls with no commitment necessary it is perfect for me. I never believed that there is a soul mate for each person. That you could be with one person forever seemed a myth. I enjoy my time with the girls I find. My brother can say what he likes it is fun. I never thought that he would be right. That there would be one girl for me, sort of. I never thought that I would find one girl I could live with for ever. I also never thought that when I found this girl she would be incapable of loving me or caring about me making our relationship commitment free all about the bedroom and not about the heart.


	2. Absent Care

**Sociopaths Can't Love You 1**

_Absence of Care_

Alex

'Twas a day in March

I decided to try my fate

A decision not perhaps wise

But one I chose to make

No care for myself

Nor truly anyone else

Left me about on the streets

Nigh the hour of three

Even the city twas dark

Perhaps a country twilight

Very few streetlights

There was snow on the ground

For it was early march

No moon this night

Collette and I we broke the law

For here to be and now

It was illegal for minors to walk the streets

To late or perhaps to early

For teens to walk the street

A decision judicious

I judge from the results

Of this night

Not wise for me to stand

Or sit

In the middle of the street

Yet I didn't care

Never would, never could

A high chance it could be calamitous

Tis true, tis true

I never did care

What of this decision could ensue

Twas a quirk of my absent care

That left me standing there

A taint of foolishness

From my empty heart

Twas not gallantry

On my part, simply idiocy

"Bus" Colette called.

"Hmm," twas my simple reply

I turned to see her face

Saw laughter in her eyes

As I tuned no horror in mine

As I saw coming, my own demise

Coming straight toward me

No time to move

None to react

Would I if I could, I think not, perhaps?

No time to think before

SLAM!

Minor pain

CRASH!

And BAM!

White light

Nothing

Was I finally dead?

Was it finally over?

Collette

We Alex and I out were very much past the time normally that people would be in beds of theirs (or not) or at least houses in. It 3:00 was then, and breaking the law were we. We, either wisely or not, were sitting, standing, or lying in the road because we were quite some time there. One person per each lane in the road, there were two lanes, two people. Yes, it made much sense to us, perhaps to you not, but to us, yes. Much sense was made to us. Perhaps it is your feeling that one should, in fact, avoid placing themselves in an area in which vehicles at high speeds propelled pass frequently, but perhaps your thinking is different from ours.

You see, you, as I am assuming, feel. With us, not the case is that. We feel not an attachment to this life, perhaps because such an attachment would mean that we should, in fact, feel love. By now, reader, you should understand that we, sociopaths being, cannot feel this attachment you deem "necessary" and "beautiful." We see not the necessity, the beauty is not there.

With this in mind, you will understand that when I informed simply Alex that a bus there was headed straight for her shell earthly, she did not react. If she wanted to react, she could have probably. She turned to see a bus, yes, heading for her as it down the road sped. Standing in some state of apathy, ennui, perhaps, got the best of her as the bus collided with flesh hers.

Now lying limp and listless on the pavement, I felt no sorrow, no concern, and no grief. Sociopaths don't, if you are trying still to grasp this concept. I rather smiled, but not laughed. There was something ironic, perhaps even if I could feel it would be gleeful, to see such a monster collide with my "best friend," if one prefers to call her this. I made no move to get out of the road for fear of the same fate.

It would be such a coincidence if, while the drivers and passengers of the halted now bus vainly attempted to receive some sort of response from the body of Alex, another bus or vehicle collided with mine own shell. I would prefer to dub my body as my vehicle. My thoughts, my person, remain in my mind, not within my mass or form physical. Feeling people gesture to their heart for the source of emotions of theirs, yet the brain, too, controls these needless and superfluous sensibilities. Perhaps I formed was without the sustenance or energy necessary to maintain this section of my brain for over 12 years, but better I am without it.

To the moment the bus had a collision with Alex we shall go back. Some cracks, her bones. Some blood, her veins spilling themselves on the pavement. Four men jump out of the van. They seem worried. Well, obviously. If you hit had a girl with van yours, you, too, I am guessing, would be frightened and worried about the repercussions, for both you and the victim. I stand, not moving. A couple of the men jumping out of the vehicle turn their heads to me and shoot angry, upset, I'm not sure, glances at me. They do not know I do not care about them or anyone else.

**Bill**

"Tom watch the road!" I yelled he had turned to talk to Georg. He had some how convinced the driver to let him drive and I was regretting it. Tom drives like a maniac. He turned and slammed on the breaks.

"Was zur HOLLE!" came Gustav's voice after a load thump which meant he probably fell out of his bunk. I was picking myself off the floor when Tom ran to the bus doors. I followed him. I saw him standing there and looked around there was a girl sprawled out on the pavement she was bloody.

"Oh she will love this!" came a voice from the side I turned as Georg knelt beside the girl feeling for a pulse or breath.

"What?" I asked the slightly creepy looking girl who sat in the middle of the other lane. She stood up and walked over to me.

"Alex," she gestured toward the girl on the ground, "is going to love this when she wakes up I mean she would rather be dead or no, she rather not, neither living nor dead for that would involve caring."

"What?"

"I apologize sincerely for I see now that you speak only plain forms of English not great literary ones."

"She's alive!" called Georg.

"Of course she is," said the girl in front of me. "My names Collette, do you wish me to call emergency services, so you don't have to take her I mean I cannot imagine what your fans would think about Tom hitting a girl with a bus?"

"Yes call 911, we will meet you guys at the hospital if you tell me where it is," Tom said coming up next to me.

"Why are you all so panicked?" the girl asked looking at all of our worried faces.

"We just hit your friend with a bus why aren't you worried?"

"I would it was I that you hit, not her but fate willed it not. Why should I care if her earthly self has been hit? She cares not, I care not, it is you who is freaking out, now." She picked up her phone and called 911.

"She scares me." Gustav said as we walked over to Alex, the girl on the pavement.

"Me too, I wonder if her friend here is the same way?" Tom mused. I knelt down next to the girl pushing her hair out of her face and wiping some of the blood away. She was gorgeous; I wondered what she would look like awake. The sirens got closer and the paramedics took the girl away.

**Okay My Authoress Note: PLEASE REVIEW!! Okay so Collette's part was once again written by Collette other than that all from my brain. PLEASE REVIEW.**


	3. Hospital

**Sociopaths Can't Love You 2**

_Hospital_

Alex

I felt my eyes begin to open

Darkness parted like a sea

'_No'_ I thought though

The world was weary

I wished not to wake

To much effort living takes

The darkness so much easier

No effort to seem normal

No need to pretend

To push a smile to 'care'

Never was pleasant

To walk the world as me

Finally my eyes did open

It was a hospital I did see

So I had been hit hard

By the bus it's true

I felt little from the crash

My body told me naught

What injuries I'd sustained

"How do you feel?"

I heard Collette

I turned to her, greatly confused

Her face a mask of worry

Why? Neither of us cared

What happened good or bad

"Thou ask how doth I fare?

Why ask when thou doth not care?"

"It's for our guests I say,"

The mask of worry faded away

"They know not what we are,

In truth they took the crash very hard."

"Well I care not what humans think,

They matter naught to me,

To tired am I,

To pretend for a stranger,"

Collette nodded.

"They were worried,

They believed me not,

When I said you did not care,

About a bus hitting your human skin,"

"Fear not," I said turning toward my 'guests'

Though perhaps that is an awkward term

While I am stuck abed

"I shall not press against thee,

Any claim of the law,

Nor press for certain favors,

I am not that way,

The fault is mine,

So depart and do not tarry,

People of your standing,

Should not laze about,

Where you are not needed,"

It felt strange to speak so cool

To one who held me under his rule

To speak this way to the man I had loved

To remain without emotion

While looking at my dream

It was however okay

For 'twas all my choice

To fore go the world

To lose love in beauty

To escape my pain

It was hard at first

To force it away

Against human nature

To let loose not to cling

Then one day my fight was won

No pain, no pleasure,

No feelings, no sorrow

My emotions the same as tomorrows

I did not miss those flighty things

Humans dubbed emotions

They tare you and they break you

Even pleasure twists black

Nothing happy lasts

Just give it all away

Even if I'll never forget the pain

I can't hold it anymore

"Is it wrong to apologize?"

Asked Bill curiosity in his eyes

"No simply not necessity,"

I almost rolled my eyes

"How can you not care?"

Tom asked

"You were hit by a bus?"

"We care about nothing"

Collette spoke with me in unison

"Nothing matters"

"Are you twins?"

Wondered Bill

"No just friends,"

Said I, Collette nodded

"If you deem to call us so"

"Though" I mused,

"'friends' involves attachment"

"Attachments such a horrid word,"

Collette spoke alternating with me

"Brings weakness to a person,"

"Do you have a heart?"

Tom wondered slightly aghast

"My pulse says yes,"

"Her soul says no,"

Alternating again

"Does that bother you?"

I asked because it's true

Collette and I scared most people

"No, I mean it seems you wouldn't need to be coddled,

No girlish emotions

Interrupting my TV time

Sounds perfect to me,"

Tom grinned at Collette and me

Mostly at her and her silent empty eyes

Bill stood silent as his brother talked

Watching me with scrutiny

Did I confuse him?

Did he find me creepy?

Did I care?

He wouldn't be the first

To leave afraid of my truth

With out any seeming's

Everyone turns away

When they see

there's no laughter

No smiles

No longer any sadness

Collette

Opened did Alex's eyes some after time the accident had taken place. Sat we six in a hospital: the members band, names whose I learned had during wait ours in hospital—Bill, Tom, Georg, and Gustav they were—and Alex and I. Not used to plastering face on of worry or concern was I, for spent was most of my time Alex with, and she cared not that I felt emotions did not. Alex sluggishly had to pull herself oblivion out of, for "liked" it she did there (there was there no need to pretend as I was now). Looks around does she and observes my expression concerned. Questions does she about my worry; I to the band gesture.

Internally, I conflict. This Tom here, in the past used I to love him a passion with. Still rather cute is he, for judgments of the sort I still can make, but there is room for love not in a sociopath. No want, no need, no urges. Would him being with happy me make? Still not sure was I. Wondering I was about Alex and whether or not she conflicted was in way the same, but her for in question the person would be not Tom, but Bill rather. We obviously feel not the same way that did we when younger we were, but it was a question still. Could we, would we?

Maybe. For now, ponder would I…but chance again I would ever have? I knew not. Perhaps. Probably not. These were people famous, and meeting again them the chance was very slim. They might us remember for a while short, but we people were too, just fans another two, and forget us shortly they would, just everyone else as had.

Beeping was Alex's monitor that her vital signs told us and ascertained at points some that was still alive she. Sat back did I and listened, remembering how fragile are humans. Any moment at, those lines flat could turn, but kept steady and pulsating did they. Odd, thought I, how fate was, how any moment at any of one of us swept away could be as a gust sudden of air away sweeps dry leaves, the same very leaves that little or nothing mean to us, just as we mean nothing or little other humans to. These humans, example for, mean nothing would to us were they not famous, but because are they, meant did they something to us at some point in time, but still we meant nothing to them until hit Alex they did a bus with.

Now that to something we meant to them, wanted did we for them to something mean again to us? Was possible even that? Questions flooded did my brain, swirling. Stared did the one that I knew to be Bill at Alex, and Georg and Gustav as well, understandably. Would not who be concerned if a girl they had just run over? But felt did I a different eyes pair on me… those of Tom. How strange, I wondered in amazement.

(A few miles away)(BTW this is first person ASHA just calls herself Asha because there's to many I's in her head)

We are different people. I am Asha they are Ashley and Tony. They have voices. They all live in our head. Ashley and Tony fight a lot. Ashley is a guy, he is evil with good voices, and Tony is his twin she is good but her voices aren't. We all like boys. **I DO NOT LIKE BOYS! **(Ashley is bold, Tony is italics) okay I'm sorry. So on this day in question we are walking down the street. _See the tree walk at it! _**Ohh I like this idea, keep walking Asha. **Asha don't want to, Tony what is it what happened why are you being mean? _The voices want you to walk Asha. _**Yea walk Asha. **ASHA WON'T!

Forcefully Asha turned herself away, the voices fought with her.

**Now Asha that's not nice. **Ashley slapped Asha. MOTHER FUCKER, I hate you, you know that?_ Come on Asha you don't hate Ashley he's just difficult sometimes! _Sometimes? More like always. **Oh shut you baby, why don't you chase that car?** _What car? I want to chase it, Asha run!_ Oh fine!

Asha ran down the street after the car. Several people stared we all ignored them. Suddenly or not so suddenly there was stop sign there the car stopped. Asha who was still running slammed into it. Asha flew up onto the trunk smashing through the rear window. Asha moaned.

**Good going you broke a window. **_Well Ashley, it was your idea. _**No Tony it was yours!**

"O my gosh! Are you okay?" the cars driver was freaking out, understandably.

"Are you calling me fat?" Asha yelled at Ashley.

"No, Mam I think you hit your head!" **Tell him no and say you must have miss heard him. **Why? _Remember if they know about us they will think we're crazy!_

"I'm sorry sir I must have misheard you I'm fine!" Asha tried to stand but pain shot through her.

"Please sit still I have to call the paramedics!"

**They are going to get us! **Asha stared Ashley who was agitated enough to appear in real life, he was tall with red hair and freckles. No they won't but my body needs to be repaired or none of us will make it! _Asha is right just listen to her Ashley as long as she is quiet no one will know. _**TONY they will get us, they will put us on meds, and we will die… **Tony appeared beside Ashley, her hair was darker than her brothers she had very few freckles and bright green eyes she was beautiful, her brother was not. She wrapped her arms around Ashley. You guys we're going I am not doing so well here. **If we get caught I am killing you! **_I don't want to die…_ none of us do…

Bill

I listened as Alex talked she spoke strangely it was more than just the fact that her voice held no emotion at all it was the way she spoke. It sounded like she should be in a different era. I watched her the nurses had cleaned her up and as I had noticed earlier she was beautiful and now it was more pronounced because the blood was all cleared away. Her eyes were green and her lashes long and dark against the pure whiteness of her skin. Her hair was in a ponytail now but it was brunette and curly, insanely so. Something about her made me want to be near her, it was like a magnet in my chest, a dangerous one. I let Tom talk, unsure as to what to say, I just stood there watching. Suddenly there was a loud commotion and another bed was rolled in. Alex looked around. A girl was sitting on the bed. She was covered in bandages but looked alert. She was obviously of mixed heritage, brown skin, hazel eyes, and dark brown hair that looked as if it had been dyed dark red recently.

"Asha!" Collette said sounding surprised. "What happened?"

"We ran over a car!" the girl, Asha, said as soon as the doctors were gone. What did she mean by '_we'_?

"Don't you mean got ran over by a car?" Tom asked.

"No we ran the car over not the other way around!"

"What do you mean by 'we'?"

"Asha is a schizophrenic she means 'we' by her and the people in her head," Alex said still looking as if all of this was perfectly normal, maybe it was for her.

"It was all Ashley!" Asha protested, "Tony tried to make Asha run into a tree but Asha wouldn't so Ashley told us to run after the car and the car stopped!"

"Well that sucks, I got ran over by a bus!" Alex said.

"Tokio Hotel bus, we always said it would be you… No Ashley I don't care majority rules… SHUT UP ASHA IS TALKING… Tony tell him to be quiet!" Tom opened his mouth to say something but Collette waved a hand at him and he was quiet. After a few moments Asha got the voices to behave and turned back to the conversation at hand. I just shook my head what had Tom gotten us into?

* * *

**A.N. I am soooo sorry it took so long but someone *cough* Collette *Cough* wouldn't type!**

I hope the length made up for some of it.. this chap was really hard to write plz review.


	4. Chapter 4

Authors note... this story is complicated and i'm busy and no one really reads it...i think im going to delete it and focus on other stories... but i do have this...

{|\*`-=_=-`*/|}

It should have surprised me

Not expecting Asha to see

But little surprises me For i need to expect to

expect i need to feel

Her craziness quite aparant to me

perhaps it is stange to have a friend

a schizophrenic friend

Then again my life with strangeness teems

Collette is a sociopath

Contentedly emprty inside

I am a psychopath

desended to the darkside

Asha is a schizophrenic

the voices make her 'sick'

a stranger day i've never had before

Us three and Tokio Hotel four

they find us strange

abnormal and unusual

I know we are yet they dont see

how strange there apperance is to me

I want to sit here

face them without fear

I know i cant

it'd be wrong

How can i be empty and not strong?

i thought emotion was weakness

Could i be wrong?

"I need to go!"

I had to get away

before my mind went astray

"I have some of your clothes,"

Collette understood in her way

her emotions are gone

mine simply forced away

"i don't know if you should you leave,"

Was that concern on Bill's face?

No i was imagining things

maybe i had hit my head

"Goodbye," i said simply stated.

"if you don't mind?"

Collette tossed me my clothes

i began to pull them from the bag

i forced myself not to look

As the boys left, my heart they took

I started shaking as i dressed

I believe simply delayed stress

I had to be in shock

Or was it my hearts turn to mock?

I don't miss it's job, its stuff

I pushed it away because it was so rough

"Casey will pick us up,"

Collette spoke in her detached way.

"I don't think we're coming!"

Asha said the doctors pausing at we.

As i walked out i felt his stares

i ran my fingers through my hair

I felt so strange

Like i MIGHT _care_...

I felt emotions bubbling

I forced them away

So sick of fighting them

Longed for darkness inside

An empty space with no pain to hide

Casey

I saw my friends exit the hospital. I wasn't surprised by the way they looked. Slightly tired they'd been up since god knows when. Collette looked cool and collected Alex looked the way she always did, perfect, she always had a small smile or a smirk or whatever emotion was appropriate it was so fake it made me sick but it was better than what was real.

"My stuff is already at the gym," Alex said.

"Your still going to fight!" Alex was in the local marshal arts tournament, she was facing _Asian Persuasion._

"Why not?"

"Asian Persuasion is fast, he's going to beat you!" Collette giggled maliciously not because anything was funny but because her best friends were going to be dueling.

"Me versus Pham," Alex grinned evilly her dark side coming out. "I don't know if I like this..." her smile faded as she realized the implications. She took out her violent side in the fights what if she hurt Pham.

"Don't worry, you'll be lucky if you can land a punch," I told Alex. Smiling at _Tokio's Goth Girl _no one knew where the name came from.

Bill

I was worried of course about the girl Tom had by the bus. Yet there was something more. Something about her green eyes, her pale skin the way she hid everything. Her friend just looked empty but she looked like there was something deep, deeper than maybe even she could see. He watched her walk out of the hospital the day after being hit by a bus perfectly fine. She was beautiful. Tom dragged me out of there he had gotten gym time and really wanted to work out. I went with him. Despite common belief I do work out when I have time. I just don't bulk up very well, which is fine because I didn't want to be some muscle head like Hagen (Georg). We'd been I the gym for half an hour. I finished the circuit I was on and went for a quick wander around. I could hear yelling from one gym so I walked in. I saw a mat and large signs Iread them. Asian Persuasion and Tokio's Goth Girl. I walked in getting closer to the fight. I wasn't really into watching wrestling or anything but this looked interesting. I saw a guy in one corner bouncing from foot to foot, he was tall slender and obviously Asian. He turned in the other direction there was a girl there stretching. She was dressed in all black and there was a Tokio Hotel sign on her head band in purple she must be Tokio's Goth Girl. He was amused to find a fighter as a fan. He watched as they warmed up. This could be interesting.


End file.
